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Post by ryancito on Nov 12, 2010 23:16:04 GMT -5
is my log line good, bad, or neither???
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Post by mscherer on Nov 13, 2010 7:47:42 GMT -5
ryancito,
It would be good if you could post your logline in the body of a message..... some of your logline has been cut off by placing it in the subject line.
Keep Writing!
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Post by ryancito on Nov 13, 2010 16:56:14 GMT -5
A time cop, haunted by the mysterious death of his father, is hunted in the past by the criminals he imprisoned in the future.
Thats the logline as of recent... Forever Man is the term or slang used to describe "time cops" in the future. They're known as forever men.
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zz
New Member
Posts: 36
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Post by zz on Nov 13, 2010 21:17:14 GMT -5
Might help if you describe that the cop can travel through time and make it more mysterious: a cop who can travel through time is hunted by the criminals he imprisons in the future...
Or, a cop haunted by the mysterious death of his father, travels through time hunted by the future criminals who know he will one day imprison them.
It's possible that you don't the need the father aspect in there at all. Using the phrase "haunted by the death of..." is very common, and it detracts from the overall premise, which is the criminals trying to bump him off before they can get arrested by this guy? Correct?
Good luck.
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Post by ryancito on Nov 14, 2010 21:43:21 GMT -5
I know exactly what u mean by the "...haunted by the death... cliche. Its just that it ends up tying in with the criminals escaping as well so it becomes an important part of the story. You're probably right though, I don't necessarily have to include that in the logline itself. Cheers!
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