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Salvage
Apr 23, 2010 13:17:51 GMT -5
Post by ldw4686 on Apr 23, 2010 13:17:51 GMT -5
Here's one that I am currently working on - it will probably change as I go forth into the story but here goes:
A captain of a salvage boat must steal a treasure buried at the bottom of sea before the villainous company that hired him gets to it first.
It will be a thriller, and essentially, the captain is hired by this company only to find out the the company is using him to steal before it's recovered by the authorities.
L
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Salvage
Apr 23, 2010 14:02:24 GMT -5
Post by glengarry on Apr 23, 2010 14:02:24 GMT -5
What's the TREASURE? Big opportunity here... maybe the slavge captain is after a traditional treasure but it turns out there is more down there that the villianous company wants...
maybe try to define the captain a bit more for us.
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Salvage
Apr 23, 2010 17:40:42 GMT -5
Post by mscherer on Apr 23, 2010 17:40:42 GMT -5
ldw4686,
We have the protagonist, the antagonist, the situation -- what are the stakes? The villainous company gets the treasure? Who cares?
The stakes MUST be higher -- MUST be something the audience will care about -- MUST be life or death or something close to it.
Keep Writing!
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Salvage
Apr 26, 2010 11:31:55 GMT -5
Post by ldw4686 on Apr 26, 2010 11:31:55 GMT -5
Thanks for the feedback - I am thinking that the stakes are going to be that the company wanted to claim it but since it's a war ship they have no claim over it because it belongs to Spain, or another country.
So, I thought the company would steal out from under the rightful country.... I don't have all the details but I thought it would be against the clock kind of movie. What do you think?
L
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Salvage
May 4, 2010 15:08:01 GMT -5
Post by CD on May 4, 2010 15:08:01 GMT -5
The elements sound good...salvage...that's always a winner.
But a villainous company? That's too impersonal. Stealing it from another country? Mmmm. Against too impersonal.
Like if it was something like:
A down on his luck salvage boat captain accepts a job to recover an ancient treasure only to find out the wreck is located in South Korean waters.
Or to pump that up a little more (not good but you'll get the idea):
A salvage boat captain who's about to lose his boat agrees to help an eccentric millionaire art buff recover an ancient underwater treasure only to find out the wreck is located in South Korean waters.
Or make it more personal:
After his brother dies and leaves him custody of his children, a down on his luck salvage boat captain attempts to recover an underwater treasure that's located in South Korean waters.
Not sure why I'm picking on South Korea...
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Salvage
May 9, 2010 13:16:25 GMT -5
Post by DVD on May 9, 2010 13:16:25 GMT -5
The villianous company is owned by his wife whose a complete B!@$ch.
Once he gets the treasure he can stick it to her.
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Salvage
May 11, 2010 11:28:18 GMT -5
Post by mattthehoople on May 11, 2010 11:28:18 GMT -5
Hows about...
A down on his luck salvage boat captain accepts a job to recover an ancient treasure only to find out the wreck contains long lost family fortune.
He'd be an expert in treasures like his long-lost family fortune, and he's washed up because he's wasted his life searching for it. His peers have always ridiculed him (and his father before him?) for trying to find it for doing the same.
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Salvage
May 11, 2010 12:27:22 GMT -5
Post by czachcross on May 11, 2010 12:27:22 GMT -5
getting better.
what does he want to do with the treasure when he gets it?
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Salvage
May 24, 2010 14:51:31 GMT -5
Post by emhoward on May 24, 2010 14:51:31 GMT -5
Sounds okay. The question for is, since you used the word 'steal' who is he stealing it from? And are they going to sit back and let him steal it? And if not shouldn't it be in the logline somewhere? Idk. Good luck.
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